What Happens When Others Get A Say Instead Of God?

Have you ever made a mistake so huge you feel as if your heart could break? This is my journey of being young, naive, and letting people who opinions shouldn’t matter have a bit too much say in your life.

Have you stopped and asked God what His plan is for your family? - thejoyfulfam.com

If it is true that age is a matter of perspective, then at that time I was the most young immature girl in the world. My husband and I had just welcomed our twins into our family in January. With them being baby 3 and 4 in our family, the comments immediately began. Are you all finished? This is it right….you are going to get this taken care of? So, when is the surgery to have this “fixed”. At the time I let all of these people’s opinions shape the direction of my family.

The boys were born in January and in November my husband lost his job. We had 30 days before our medical insurance would be canceled. Not knowing what all we would be faced with, we quickly made every check up and dental appointment for the 6 of us that could be squeezed in. In the midst of all those appointments, was the one that we would both regret the moment we left the office. We went and got things “fixed”.  I remember leaving that office and thinking we just made the biggest mistake of our marriage yet.

Why is it that we allow people who shouldn’t matter to influence the decisions of our families. What I have learned from this entire experience is that no one’s opinion matters except God’s. In the midst of all the opinions, did I ever stop and ask HIM what his opinion was for my family? No, I let people who I see once or twice a year impact something that was none of their business. Why do people think they have a right to comment on the size of my family? They don’t!

If you are young and on the fence about a major family decision, I encourage you to seek the Father about what to do. Block out the millions of opinions of people who shouldn’t have a say. Get alone with your spouse and pray about the direction you are supposed to take. I pray none of you have to endure the regret and frustration that I have had on my journey.

However, I know my God is faithful and FULL of grace. Even when we mess up with something that seems can’t be undone, He is there in the midst. My story isn’t over, and I can’t wait to share the next part of our journey!


About Heather

I am a wife of 15 years to my best friend, mom to 6 incredible little ones, and a daughter of the King! Join me on my journey as I strive to serve the Lord with all my heart and live my life to the fullest!

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6 Responses to What Happens When Others Get A Say Instead Of God?

  1. Vicki Arnold March 28, 2013 at 8:36 pm #

    I regretted the decision immediately, too. I spent the next 5 years longing for another baby, learning to forgive my husband, and working to not let it become an idol for me. God is so good, gracious, and merciful. Blessings to you for sharing your story. 🙂

  2. Dollie @ Teachers of Good Things March 29, 2013 at 12:42 pm #

    God is a powerful God and full of grace! I think Abraham and Sarah are the best examples of God restoring what husband and wife ruin.

    Be encourage, He is a God of Miracles and healing.

    Looking forward to what He will do!

  3. Alison Wood March 30, 2013 at 4:28 am #

    Thanks for sharing your story. It is sad that our society today does not think children are a blessing. What is even sadder is that Christians are listening to the world instead of God. God calls them a heritage of Lord, and the world calls them mistakes and nuisances. You may enjoy my most recent post called “The Narcissistic Parent” where I offer a rebuttal to a parenting article written by a Christian pastor. He basically said he wanted to hold older people under water that told him to enjoy his kids while they are little. So sad! Not only that, he has over 500 comments and most of them are positive feedback from Christians.
    Thank you for taking a stand and encouraging others to seek God’s will in their lives. Keep up the good work!
    Visiting from Pint-sized Treasures

  4. Honey Rowland March 30, 2013 at 9:15 am #

    Reproduction rights are no one else’s to make but yours. I understand because the same questions were asked to us…after all we had “one of each.” But we wanted more. We had one more…and 10 miscarriages. No one understands when you just feel there’s more…your heart isn’t full enough of sticky fingers… I wish you peace and send you healing energy. I would love to have more but I just don’t think it’s in the cards for us. 🙁 I bet it is for you and yours though!



  1. Fixing what never should have been brokenThe Joyful Family - April 6, 2013

    […] recently shared the beginning of our story. You can read my thoughts about what happens when others get a say instead of God. I talked about how we got things “fixed”. When the truth is we really broke something […]

  2. The Lord Had A Plan!The Joyful Family - April 11, 2013

    […] it is the 3rd part of our journey. I shared with you about what happened to us when we allowed everyone else to have a say in our decisions instead of seeking God. Then I shared with your how we had to fix what never should have been broken. Now I get to share […]

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